Naked
Who are you? How do you define yourself?
Right now I feel vulnerable and flimsy, I've just cut myself off from two of my most abused shopping options. Amazon have a great time saving option called "one click" ordering, you simply ask the site to remember your address and payment details and then you can order anything with one click. This is a very bad thing if you are an impulse driven instant gratification shopper, ie me!
I love Amazon, they stock many of my favourite disparate things : Le Creuset pans, Estee Lauder moisturiser and the more obvious books and dvds, but tonight I cut myself off. I have deleted my credit card details from the one click system and as I'm not physically in posession of a credit card I can't re-enter them in a weak moment.
Paypal is my other nemesis, send money to etsy vendors at the drop of a hat, oooh yes please! Buy things drunkenly from ebay late at night mmmmmmm that's me. Well not anymore it isn't, I have deleted my credit card as a funding option from paypal. I will delete the account totally once I've done a "girl in the green scarf" and had a massive sell off as per the shopaholic film.
So I should be feeling strong and empowered, I've done good in future damage limitation but instead I feel hollow and a bit lost.
Who am I if I can't buy things on a whim? Who will want to be my friend if I can't buy them awesome presents from quirky etsy shops? What defines me if it isn't a designer handbag bought guiltily from ebay?
I'm not enjoying this, personal growth is chuffing overrated. I'm planning a big purge and ebaying a lot of random things that I don't need in order to repay some of the overdraft to begin with. Then I need to look at repaying my other debts, but feck alone knows how I'm going to do that. Previously I've taken consolidation loans, remortgaged the house and in a depressing cycle have run up more debts on then empty CCs, so I am utterly resolved not to do that again but would one big loan be a better idea than just repaying minimum on 4 cards? Or will history repeat itself and will I find a new skip full of shiny trash to burden myself with?
Feeling totally crap right now. Just as well I've denied myself Amazon and paypal or else this would be prime binge material.
Right now I feel vulnerable and flimsy, I've just cut myself off from two of my most abused shopping options. Amazon have a great time saving option called "one click" ordering, you simply ask the site to remember your address and payment details and then you can order anything with one click. This is a very bad thing if you are an impulse driven instant gratification shopper, ie me!
I love Amazon, they stock many of my favourite disparate things : Le Creuset pans, Estee Lauder moisturiser and the more obvious books and dvds, but tonight I cut myself off. I have deleted my credit card details from the one click system and as I'm not physically in posession of a credit card I can't re-enter them in a weak moment.
Paypal is my other nemesis, send money to etsy vendors at the drop of a hat, oooh yes please! Buy things drunkenly from ebay late at night mmmmmmm that's me. Well not anymore it isn't, I have deleted my credit card as a funding option from paypal. I will delete the account totally once I've done a "girl in the green scarf" and had a massive sell off as per the shopaholic film.
So I should be feeling strong and empowered, I've done good in future damage limitation but instead I feel hollow and a bit lost.
Who am I if I can't buy things on a whim? Who will want to be my friend if I can't buy them awesome presents from quirky etsy shops? What defines me if it isn't a designer handbag bought guiltily from ebay?
I'm not enjoying this, personal growth is chuffing overrated. I'm planning a big purge and ebaying a lot of random things that I don't need in order to repay some of the overdraft to begin with. Then I need to look at repaying my other debts, but feck alone knows how I'm going to do that. Previously I've taken consolidation loans, remortgaged the house and in a depressing cycle have run up more debts on then empty CCs, so I am utterly resolved not to do that again but would one big loan be a better idea than just repaying minimum on 4 cards? Or will history repeat itself and will I find a new skip full of shiny trash to burden myself with?
Feeling totally crap right now. Just as well I've denied myself Amazon and paypal or else this would be prime binge material.
Hi there - it's levelek here. You need to look at the interest rates on all of your current cards. Then look at the interest rate of a consolidated loan, if that is an option. Also: talk you your bank(s)! You might be able to negotiate a lower interest rate, if you show them your budget.
ReplyDeleteIt's trite but true, real friends are not interested in you because of the presents you are buying them.
You can still show thoughtfulness by keeping tract of their lives, showing concern, listening, etc. You can organise your friends to go to free events (you are in London, right?). You can bake cookies. I mean, my friends and I often even forget to buy birthday presents, or don't do it for other reasons, and we still like each other, a lot!
Sadly not in London... boo.
ReplyDeleteReal friends don't even care if you bake cookies, or organise events. This real friend is quite happy to sit and chat while doing bugger all else.
There is a saying in Spanish which I got form a Jilly Cooper book:- it translates as "With you, bread and onions". Which means, I will stay with you even if we are poor / if you only have bread and onions to eat, it doesnt matter because you have each other.
Friends like us = contigo, pan y cebolla.
Agreed, Lovi :) I was only mentioning those positive activities because they might make it easier to transition out of the gift-giving compulsion.
ReplyDelete